(Disclaimer: I AM NO LONGER SOBER)

I got sober when I was 19 years old. I had no idea what I was signing up for as my family had just done an intervention on me after Christmas. The census was to fly to California to check into a rehab called Sober College. I could get sober while continuing my schooling (my mother’s ideal situation for me). They got me to agree by telling me it was a minimum of 30 days and maximum of 90 days.

Did I know what I was agreeing to in that moment, hell no! Would I be on my best behavior so that I would get out at 30 days? Absofuckinglutely! My poor sister got the honors of bringing me to rehab. I sobbed to her in the car after we toured their community center and were headed to the girl’s house. After showing us around and introducing me to everyone, we headed to the car where my suitcases were already sitting on the driveway and my sister was hugging me goodbye. She was leaving me. My tears did not work.

I woke up first, helped make coffee, and would get all my chores done without being asked a second time. I made it my mission to be on my best behavior to GTFO within 30 days. Until about two weeks in, my counselor came into my room with my father on the phone. (We were not allowed our cell phones for 30 days and only got 15 min. calls to family on the weekend) My parents had learned that the program was a MINIMUM of 90 days and maximum of however long they thought you needed. My dad asked to speak to me immediately to inform me of this. It was in that moment on the phone that I knew I had two choices. I could admit defeat and accept this, or I could break out the tears and manipulate my father to bringing me home. I stayed.

My life wasn’t that bad prior to checking into rehab but it was bad enough for me. It wasn’t going anywhere. I had been in trouble with police a few times and was fortunate enough to walk away with my record expunged. To give you an idea of who I was back then, the last time I got arrested, I LITERALLY asked the officer if anyone had ever played “Bad Boys” in the background while being pulled over.